Witches Of East End Season 2 Episode 4 Recap: Wonder Twin Powers Activate

Uh Oh, This Doesnt Look Good

"Brothers Grimoire" opens with Wendy and Tommy on a picnic date. A rat scurries by. Wendy (being a good cat) grabs it with her long nails (ie claws). She flings it down. Raty hightails it back to the bushes. And its just another ordinary day in East End. 

As you recall from last week Victor was being tortured by someone. It turns out to be the rat (Isis) and her twin (Ivar). Those two are definitely closer than they should be. Can you say "twincest"? Anyway they're looking for the key to get back to Asgard. Victor doesnt have it. They intercept the text from Joanna to Victor about Frederick. They head over to the bar to find their old friend. Apparently both sets of twins used to cause a ruckus back in Asgard. I still dont understand when Isis and Ivar got to East End and where they were up until now. 

Frederick says he doesnt have the key either. Isis kidnaps Freya. She and Victor will die in two hours if they dont fork over the key. Frederick manages to stop Ivar by making a snake in a spell book come to life and bite him. One dead twin, one to go. When Joanna finds out whats going on, she is NOT happy. 

Meanwhile the fates may be trying to tell Wendy and Tommy something. So far she's stabbed him in the back with a dart, a car has almost run over them and she kissed him after eating peanuts (and dude has a serious peanut allergy). Is Wendy just afraid of a serious relationship or is something else going on?

In story line C Dash and Killian discover their inheritance from mommy Penelope. It turns out to be a spell book (grimoire). And like any curious would-be-warlocks, they decide to perform a spell. Unfortunately they didnt read the fine print. It sucks all the life force out of Kilian and gives it to Dash. Now Killian is dying. Luckily they call Ingrid who is able to help (after a brief stop to snog the blue tentacled monster). 

Next Time How Bout Reading The Directions On The Spell First?

Back at the torture chamber, Joanna is trying all the spells she can think of but nothing is working. In fact its making things worse. Victor finally convinces Joanna to have him trade seats with Freya. She will live and he will go BOOM! 

Points to Ponder:

  • Why would Victor trade places with Freya? Freya will be reborn if she dies and Victor will not. Also why was everyone cursed by Daddy Odin when they left Asgard except for Victor? Is Victor really dead? Freya thinks so. The news drives her back into Killian's arms. Where is Owl Girl?
  • Ivar is dead but Isis appears to be alive. Will we see her again? I hope so. She was great and I love me some Rachel Nichols. How does she have time to guest star on "Witches Of East End" when she's in every scene of each episode of "Continuum"?
  • When will we learn what's up with the blue sex monster?
  • Do you still distrust Frederick? I do. 
  • Is Tommy doomed to some horrible tragic death if he's with Wendy?. 
  • Favorite Quote: "Anyone but Joanna. That bitches scares me."- Isis the Rat about her fear of Joanna.

Grade: 4 Monsters (out of 5). I'm liking season 2 even more than season 1 (and I really liked that one). 

The World According To GMonster
TV:  Heavy On Sci Fi, Horror & Adventure; Light On Realit

Running Wild With Bear Grylls Season 1 Episode 1 Recap: Zac Attack (Season Premiere)


This new six episode series on NBC features Bear Grylls taking a celebrity into a remote location for two days. First up is Zac Efron in the Catskills Mountains. They parachute out of a helicopter, repel down some cliffs, off a waterfall and across a rope strung between two cliffs.  

They find a cave to sleep in. Bear shows how to make fire by using a battery from a head lamp. Connect a chewing gum wrapper to the positive and negative ends and voila. You have fire. They finds some eggs and some worms. Bear cooks up an omelet (complete with shells since they have minerals and vitamins). 

Zac talks a little about rehab. I dont know a lot about Zac Efron but he seems like a cool guy who's grounded and up for a challenge. 

Tip Of The Week:
  • Always take extra para cord (since it can be used for some many different things). 

Favorite Quotes: 
  • "Good survival is about being opportunistic. When you come across something, make the best use of it."- Bear
  • "Good survival is about saving energy."- Bear

Grade: No grade is assigned since this is a reality show. "Running Wild" is not for the die hard survival crowd but it will introduce a new group to Bear thanks to his celebrity guests. I wont do weekly reviews but will check back intermittently to see how it's going. 

The World According To GMonster
TV:  Heavy On Sci Fi, Horror & Adventure; Light On Reality

The Strain Episode 3 Recap: Echorsts Morning Beauty Regiment

Echorst Is My New Favorite German Vampire (Not That I Know Any Others, Thank Goodness)

"Gone Smooth" opens with Echorst getting ready for his day. He has quite an extensive beauty regiment... gives a while new meaning to "putting your face on". He delicately applies his nose, then his neck, then his ears, then contact lenses, and then some hair. Incidentally, his hair piece looks better than Eph's. Add some dentures and some light (make that heavy) concealer. Top it all off with a snappy tailored suit and "voila". You are a sexy beast! 

We catch up with the four survivors:

Geek Guy (Ansel) is home with his wife Anna Marie. She is a major pain. I hope he eats her. She complains because he left her to take care of the kids and the dog got loose. What a wienie. He later drinks blood from a steak in the fridge. Nothing strange going on here.

Rocker Dude (Gabe) is continuing to have medical issues. He asks his doc for help with some "private" problems. Translation: his pee pee is about to fall off. He's already so far gone, he just flushes it down the toilet and moves on. Ouch! Also I'm not plumber but I'd think that would be really hard on the septic system. 

Eph is saved from attack by a phone call while he's in the Dead French Girl (Emma's) house. She creepily stares around the corner. She is my favorite. 

The Pilot (Captain Redfern) is in an incubation chamber. Eph and crew try to help him but he goes full blown vampire and attacks Nora. She fights him off with an IV stand. This is the first time our folks have seen a vampire. Helpful hint people: Do NOT throw away your weapons after the fight is over (cause we ALL know its not really over). Luckily Eph beans Doyle in the head with a fire extinguisher. Game over. 

The Doctor Told Me I Could Be Out Of The Hospital By Tuesday

There are no sightings of Mean Lawyer Lady (Joan) which is fine with me. No one will be able to tell when she becomes a vampire since she so obnoxious to start with. 

And here's where our other main characters are:

Abraham has his day in court. He plays stupid and the judge lets him go. Nora tries to get additional info from him but he says she's not ready. He pays a hacker to get him the names of all the passengers. Looks like he has to do everything himself since the CDC bozos are no help. 

Fet (the exterminator) notices an uptick in vermin attacks in the city. He later sees a bunch of rats jumping into the ocean. People, when the rats start leaving, it's time for us to go too!

Eph loses custody of his son. His ex-wife is sad. No one cares. Get rid of these scenes so there is more time for vampires!

We learn a little more about Sean Astin (aka Jim Kent). He's in debt to the vamps because he wife has cancer. And how many times did they say his full name in this episode? Go Jim Kent and do the vampires bidding. Too bad your name is not Clark Kent.  

And Regina King is still alive but who knows for how long. 

In the interest of public health, here's how to recognize a vampire:

  • Bloodshot eyes
  • Parasitic worms crawling about
  • Bad dental hygiene
  • Junk falls off (I'm not sure what happens to women)
  • Hair falls out
  • Ringing in the ears, hears voices
  • Has the sudden urge to bite people
  • Has a freaky worm like tongue with a bunch of teeth on the end, excellent for people slurping 

Favorite Quotes:

  • "Soon no more charades. To victory!"- Thomas Echorst as he stares at himself in the mirror. 
  • Abraham says the vampires "will to devour the world and swallow the light".
  • New words to add to the "Oxford English Dictionary"-- vampenis, vampilot, basically anything with "vam" in front of it. 

Grade: 4 Monsters (out of 5). Episode 3 proved more interesting than "The Box". I hope they keep it up. We need less time dedicated to Eph's personal and more to vampire chomping. 

The World According To GMonster
TV:  Heavy On Sci Fi, Horror & Adventure; Light On Reality

Defiance Season 2 Episode 6 Recap: Stahmas Needlepoint And Bra Burning Circle

These Red Shirts Are Wearing Blue Hats

Wow, "Defiance" just keeps getting better and better. It is definitely one of my most favorite shows on TV. 

In "This Woman's Work" Viceroy Mercado makes a surprise appearance in town. An Arkfall is going to occur soon. The ship has been in orbit for 17 years. Mercado wants the canisters on board to create a weapon (and he needs to get reelected). Niles and Nolan must work together to retrieve them. Nolan thinks they're looking for an infinite power source. They take Churchill (the Bioman) along for the ride. 

When they get there the canisters are broken and the gunalee is roaming around zapping people. Gunalees are made of pure energy and as such as only viewable if wearing a suit. It kinda looks like a sexy female light bulb with four arms. It shrieks when attacking.  

This Is A Gunalee

Nolan and Niles come up with a plan to kill the creature. However, poor Churchill bites the big one first. They are finally successful. Mercado calls their mission a failure though. He has no canisters. He exiles Pottinger to Dakota Reach (I may have the name wrong) as punishment. 

In other related news, Tommy quits his job as sheriff because he cant stand Nolan. He plans to move to Texas with Berlin. But he runs into Irisa in the market. He secretly follows and sees her kill a Casti. Irisa says its not what it looks like and that he will regain consciousness soon. While they wait on the deadie to revive, Irisa asks Tommy about his relationship with Berlin. Long story short, the Casti is alive and Tommy tells Berlin that he cant go to Texas with her. They break up. Tommy still loves Irisa (even though he says he's moved on). 

Datak secretly shows Rafe a suitcase with something  (is it an energy source?). They are still plotting to overthrow the Earth Republic. Stahma shows up and is not receptive when Rafe suggests they invite Datak to dinner or maybe just desert. Too funny. 

Stahma is castigated by Favi Kurr for not knowing her place as a woman. She chats with Amanda about women's lib (human style). She then meets with some of the other wives (including Favi's). They do not seem particularly receptive to Stahma's suggestions. So she kills them all with some tea. I didnt see that coming. However it makes sense later because Favi is framed for the murders (and is stoned on the shaming rack). How fitting that the stone placed by Stahma is the one that kills him. Datak knows what actually happened. I cant tell if he's frightened or impressed or a bit of both. 

When Are These People Going To Learn To NEVER Mess With Stahma?

And in the closing montage that we've become accustomed to, both Mercado and Christie get their freak on by cosplaying at a Casthithan bar. Are those two going to hook up or what? Meanwhile Berlin and Nolan have sexy times. So much for Tommy and Amanda. I must say I like the Berlin/Nolan coupling though. Should we call them Bolan or Nerlin?  

Favorite Quotes:

  • "I have prepared a special blend of fragrant tea."- Stahma to the other ladies before she kills them.
  • "Irisa is real. That is made a spare parts and a few stem cells"- Nolan referring to Churchill the Bioman. 
  • "Still I come form a culture that worships dicks"- Stahma to Amanda when they're talking about women's lib. 
  • "There's nothing more dangerous to people like us than an honest man"- Datak to Stahma about Favi Kurr. 
  • "What kind of world do we live in where women conspire to overthrow the church?" says Datak. "A world of great change" replies a smiling Stahma. 

Grade: 4 1/2 Monsters (out of 5). I really wish I was at SDCC to see the "Defiance" panel since fabulous Ms Jamie Murray will be there. Oh well, maybe next year. I just hope "Defiance" lasts that long. 

The World According To GMonster
TV: Heavy On Sci Fi, Horror & Adventure; Light On Reality

Dominion Episode 6 Recap: 8 Balls Are People Too

Daddy, Is There Something You've Been Meaning To Tell Me (Like You've Been Having An Affair With The 8 Ball In Mother's Body And Are Now Planning To Kill Her?)

"Dominion" must still be growing on me since "Black Eyes Blue" was my most favorite episode to date. Last week Alex (ie the Chosen One) captured Clementine. He didnt have the heart to kill her though since she is/was Claire's mother. What he doesnt know is that the General already secretly asks Michael to kill her. 

No one is sure what to do with Clementine. Is she a lower angel or is she Claire's mother or is she a little bit of both? Claire is at first skeptical but Clementine keeps calling her "Izzy" (which is a term only her mother used).  Alex wants to try to separate the lower angel from the human's body with an exorcism (which they refer to as an "eviction"). Michael warns that it could end badly for both parties. Alex says he must try anyway. In order to perform the ritual, Michael retrieves a book (the Apocrypha) from Uriel. He offers a Vermeer painting in exchange. Uriel rejects the offer. She wants to see Alex's tattoos instead. My suspicion is she just wants to see him shirtless. Uriel apparently memorized Alex's tattoos since the next we see of her, she's busy drawing them on some large sheets of paper. Michael asks her to register them to memory only (so there will be no way for Gabriel to find out). Oh poor stupid Michael. Dont know by now that Uriel is working with Gabriel anyway?  

Meanwhile William Whele and Daddy David continue to have a tumultuous relationship. David sends some soldiers over to kill a bunch of Black Acolytes. William holds a gun to David's head but cant bring himself to pull the trigger. Instead he takes David to one of his freaky Gabriel Loving Under Church ceremonies and cracks his ribs. I dont think these two are going to make up anytime soon. 

Arika from Helena is still wandering the halls of Vega. She agrees to overthrow her wife Evelyn. Then Helena will use it's bomber to deliver the nuke that Vega is building. Their target is Gabriel's stronghold. Where is that anyway? I thought he had a place way up in heaven that no one (except angels) could get to.  

And onto the main event. Alex uses his tattoos to manifest the prayer he needs to recite. Clementine spends some time crawling on the walls and the ceiling. That was fun. It looks like the exorcism, I mean the eviction, is a success. Clementine's eye's change back to blue, her pointy teeth recede and her face veins are gone. But just then, Clementine collapses. I thought that was way too easy. Clementine is dying. Uh, I seem to recall Michael telling y'all that... but no one bothered to listen.  Claire holds Clementine and sings the song from the music box. Then she quietly suffocates her mother. Oh the feels.  

In an excellent scene, Claire confronts Reisen about his lies. I'm not sure any amount of family counseling can cure their relationship. Claire informs him that after she is wed, he MUST step down as head of the government. Claire will become the Queen of Vega.

Favorite Quotes & Miscellanea:
  • When Uriel asks where Michael got the Vermeer painting he says "the Wynn Hotel". Of course, because Steve Wynn has a gazillion dollars worth of paintings there now. 
  • "Take your best shot but you better not miss"- David to William as a gun is being held to his head. 
  • Who else felt sorry for the demon/angel? It didnt have a body so it took Clementine's. It tried to live a repentant life and took good care of the body. I think they should give it another body. Surely there's one that wouldnt be missed. 
  • Claire blames Alex for her mother's death so it will be a while before the two love birds are back together again. 
  • There were three extremely powerful scenes in this episode: 1. Claire holding her mother and singing to her as she killed her; 2. Claire confronts the General; 3. The second Willy vs David smackdown. Are these two going to beat on each other each week? If so, no complaints here. I'm liking it. 

Grade: 4 1/2 Monsters (out of 5): Best episode to date. Excellent acting all around. If "Dominion" keeps this up, it will be at the top of my list.  

The World According To GMonster
TV:  Heavy On Sci Fi, Horror & Adventure; Light On Reality

Extant Episodes 2 Thru 3 Recaps: Just Your Typical Family Dinner With a Biracial Couple And A Robot Boy And An Alien Fetus


I'd like to take this opportunity to predict that husband and robot daddy John is involved in this whole get-Molly-pregnant-with-an-alien-baby plot.  I could be wrong but we'll see. I just dont trust him. Anyway, here's the other goings on in episode 2 "Extinct" and episode 3 "Wish You Were Here":
  • John goes to see his new lab courtesy of Mr Yasumoto. Mrs Dodd (the woman who previously rejected his proposal) shows up. Alien Marcus visits Molly again. We see something creeping around in her stomach. That doesnt look like a baby to me. 
  • Ethan goes to the natural history museum. Those holographic animals were really cool. 
  • Molly tells Sam that Harmon is alive. He didnt kill himself and he doesnt trust the ISEA. Sam says she is scared because whatever happened to Harmon in space is now happening to Molly. What if Sam is really working for the ISEA and is monitoring Molly? I now see monitors everywhere. Thanks "Orphan Black"!
  • Flashback to Harmon during his space mission. While Molly saw her dead boyfriend, Marcus saw his long dead mother.
  • Molly ditches her monitoring tether (that was in her mouth). The security dude later stops her car and gives it back to her.  
  • Dr Barton does an ultrasound at the vet's office and shows Molly she has a normal developing fetus. Hmmm I dont think so. This reminds me of "Rosemary's Baby". 
  • Alan Sparks goes to Mr Y's house and says if "they" are here, we dont have a backup plan. Y replies with "we're honored your daughter Katie's sacrifice". What happened to Katie? 
  • Last week we had driverless cars. Now everyone is driving themselves around town. What's up with that?
  • Ethan has is first day at school (even though some of the parents dont want him there). Ethan traps a bird under a pot. Not sure what that's about. Lay off the birds Robot Boy!
  • Molly's boss convinces her that the baby is really hers and Johns (and that her being pregnant is part of a secret fertility project). Sorry I'm not buying that.  Molly finally tells John she is with child. 
  • Molly says she saw Tim (Marcus' brother) at her birthday party. No one else saw Tim. John and the other guests become alarmed by Molly's hallucinations. 
  • Alan drives Molly back the ISEA to be monitored. Dr Barton finds they are doing strange stuff back at the lab (like taking all her files). She texts Molly and tells her to get out of the car STAT! And who is driving the car behind them except for John. How convenient. Next we see the swat team storming their house but John, Molly and Robot Boy are gone. 
  • What are your thoughts about the show thus far? Do you believe John is in on the conspiracy? 

Favorite Quotes & Miscellanea:
  • "What is extinct?"- Ethan to robot guide. 
  • "Are you weak?"- Ethan to Molly. She thinks he's concerned about her health but he's really asking if she's a weak species and will become extinct. 
  • Ethan is referred to as a "toaster with hair" by one of the school's parents. 
  • "He's not dangerous. He's just different and you dont have to be afraid of different"- Molly to the other parents about Ethan. This is my favorite line of the show thus far. 
  • "We were the experiments"- Harmon to Molly. 
  • Sure Molly, telling your Robot Son its OK to keep secrets is perfectly all right. What harm could come of that?
  • Where can I get a good deal on a flesh printer?
Grade: 3 1/2 Monsters (out of 5). I'm liking the show but still waiting for it to get to the really good stuff--- alien babies! 

The World According To GMonster
TV:  Heavy On Sci Fi, Horror & Adventure; Light On Reality

The Bridge Episode 3 Recap: Let Us Pause For A Moment To Remember Vickers

Have No Fear, Linder (And His Beard) Are Here

"Sorrowsworn" opens with Eleanor trying on clothes at a department store. The clerk attempts to help her but Eleanor wants to be alone. I dont blame her. Some of us need space when shopping. We get to see more of Eleanor's tattoos. There's a Medusa on her chest which Eleanor sticks with a straight pin until it bleeds. Besides some new frumpy clothes, Eleanor picks up a 55 gallon drum and some cleaning supplies. Wonder what (or who) she'll put in there? 

Meanwhile, Sonya is less than impressed with Jack Dobb's performance in bed saying "it was not as good as last time". Ouch. Frye and Adriana tell Millie's nephew that his boyfriend is dead. He was stuffed in a duffel bag. Raul says he saw him with the "woman in charge" (which I assume is Eleanor). Raul is later stabbed to death.  

Some kids from Juarez ambush Ray and Cesar and steal their stash (which was cleverly hid up a horse's bum). Poor Vickers, may he rest in peace. Speaking as asses, Ray calls Charlotte and tells her to "remember the plan". Fausto is not happy that his drug shipment is gone. Someone will pay. Cesar takes his chances and stays with his family. Ray and Charlotte go on the run.  

We also see the return of Linder in this episode. His crazy beard should get it's own credits. He heads to Bob's ranch. Bob has a Mexican cop strung up in the shed. And Eva must have told Linder some of what happened  because he later bashes the cop's head in with a rock. I'm sure the guy really, really deserved it though.  

Eleanor goes to kill the other kid who saw her at the car wash. Luckily for him, he wets himself out of fear. She sees he's just a kid and let's him live. Before leaving she whispers "Your friend, he's with the butterflies". 

Marco and Sonya find Kyle's body in that 55 gallon drum. Eleanor watches on from a distance. Poor Kyle. All he wanted to do was touch a booby and now he's dead for it. 

Grade: 3 1/2 Monsters (out of 5). I'm disappointed that Eleanor didnt do anything badass this week. Instead she spent the whole episode shopping and cleaning up her previous mess. Hopefully she'll be at it again soon. I also want to hear more about how she went from being a Mennonite to an assassin/accountant for the drug cartel. 

The World According To GMonster
TV: Heavy On Sci Fi, Horror & Adventure; Light On Reality

The Strain Episode 2 Recap: Hi Im Eph And Im Powerless Over Vampires

Dont Mind Me, I'm Just Going To Soak In The Bath For A While (Said The Dead French Girl)

In episode 2 entitled "The Box" the coffin has made it across the river (thanks to Gus). Eph and Nora are still trying to figure out what's up. Both the dead and those released from quarantine are starting to infect others. In other happenings:

  • The political higher ups (encouraged by Eldritch) determine that everyone on the plane died of carbon monoxide poisoning. Yeah right. They release the four quarantined passengers since nothing strange is going on with them. Apparently bloodshot eyes and blood hacking are commonplace in the big city. 
  • What's left of Bishop is found. His head has been stomped by that vampiry thing we saw last week. 
  • Eichorst visits Abraham Setrakian in prison. They go WAY back. Apparently Abraham was in a concentration camp in WWII and Eichorst was a Nazi guard. Eich keeps referring to Abe's wife/girlfriend Sardu (I may have the name spelled wrong). Hers is the heart we saw Abe feeding previously.  And if there were an Emmy for finger pointing, it should go to Eich. That was super creepy and very effective. 
  • Later Eichorst takes Eldritch Palmer to meet the box and the "Master". Eldritch is seriously afraid of the big tall vampire. Hmmm. Maybe this wasnt such a good plan (causing the extinction of the human race and all).  
  • Everyone has forgotten about Dr Bennett from the last episode. He's long dead. Some friends you guys are. Oh and there's nothing unusual about all those missing dead bodies. 
  • Eph goes to an AA meeting. "Hi I'm Eph and I'm powerless over vampires." "Welcome Eph!" In other news Eph goes to see his son. His wife and her new boyfriend are doing home renovations. Who cares? Not me. 
  • We meet Vasiliy Fet who's a health inspector. He has lots of vermin catching experience so better keep him around. They're going to need him later. 
  • Why hello Regina King (Ruby). I hope she plays a bigger part on the show. And what about Sean Astin? His contribution to this episode was upchucking after finding Bishop's body. 
  • The best scene award goes to the french girl chilling in the bath tub. She very much reminded me of an alligator patiently awaiting it's prey (which in her case was Daddy). 

Favorite Quotes:
  • “A good story always trumps the truth, just give the press a villain to hate."- Eldritch.
  • "You're not a hero or a savior. You're just a number."- Eichorst to Abraham. 
  • "Ive never felt more excited about a meeting in my entire life"-  Eldritch about meeting the "Master". 

Grade: 4 1/2 Monsters (out of 5). Yes the show is slow at times but so far it has enough going to keep me coming back. "The Strain" is scheduled to run 13 episodes so I guess they have to stretch it out with some miscellaneous scenes. 

The World According To GMonster
TV:  Heavy On Sci Fi, Horror & Adventure; Light On Reality

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