Sharknado 5 Review: Thank God For Pope Fabio

"Sharkado 5: Global Swarming" aired on Sunday on the SyFy channel. If you're not familiar with the franchise, here's the basics. The story doesnt make any sense and dont have to. It's all about over the top fun. Fin and his family/friends battle freak sharknados (tornadoes containing an endless supply of sharks). Sharknados can appear without warning and devour everyone in their path. They especially like to chomp on D-list celebrities.

Fin Shepard (Ian Ziering), his robot wife April (Tara Reid) and son Gil are in the UK. Fin and sidekick Nova (Cassie Scerbo) descend into a cave underneath Stonehenge to retrieve a device ancient humans use to fend off sharks. Unfortunately this unleashes a sharknado of biblical proportions which swallows up Gil.

The spouses and Nova's Shark-Fighting-Sisters travel the world in hopes of stopping the outbreaks and rescuing Gil. They get several assists along the way. Olivia Newton John and her daughter give April a cyborg makeover. Loving the pink highlights girl. And who knew the Sydney Opera House was actually a missile defense weapon?

They quickly pass through Mexico, Brazil, Kansas, etc. In Japan they encounter a Shark-zilla. In Egypt they activate a flying pyramid. In Rome Pope Fabio gives Fin a "holy" chainsaw which has mystical shark fighting powers.

The endless supply of D-listers include: Chris Kattan (as the British Prime Minster), Charo (as the Queen), Brett Michaels, Dance Mom, the NBC morning folks (Al Roker, Hoda, Kathy Lee), Geraldo Rivera (who's building a shark killing air ship?), Gilbert Gottfried, Tony Hawk, Margaret Cho, and Nichelle Nichols (Uhura from "Star Trek")... to name a few. And is it just me or are some of the "surgically inhanced" celebrities frightening? I seriously hope this is NOT the way our society is headed. Scary!

I also lost track of the number of TV/movie references including: "Indiana Jones", "Star Trek", "Back To The Future", etc.

Anywho, back to the story (and I use the term lightly). Gil is never recovered. Nova dies in a surprisingly touching moment. April dies a fitting andoid death. Fin screams while holding her robot head.

Crushed after losing his family, Fin wanders a destroyed planet. That is, until some guy shows up in a hummer. It's a grown up Gill (played by Dolph Lundgren). He's back from the future to pick up Dad and make the world safe again. Off they go "Back To The Future" style. I'm sure we'll see them again.

Grade: 4 1/2 Monsters (out of 5). After five installments, I'm still loving "Sharknado". Just don't expect a cohesive plot, great acting, decent dialogue or even good CGI. Take the show for what it 's worth... campy violent slock... and you won't be disappointed.