Marvel's InHumans Episode 1-2 Reviews: Wasn't Great But Where Can I Get A 2000 Lb Teleporting Dog?

"Marvel's Inhumans" premiered two episodes last night on ABC. There are eight total (so six more are planned). "Inhumans" is a MCU tie-in to "Agents Of SHIELD" where we've been hearing about inhumans for some time.

The main characters are inhumans that live in a secret city of the moon called Attilan. It's not necessarily a great place to live. Resources are scarce and there's a strict caste system. Humans on Earth are unaware of Attilan's existence. The series centers on the royal family which includes:

Black Bolt- the King of the inhumans. Unfortunately he's a silent ruler because if he opens his mouth people die. Just ask his parents.
Maximus- Black Bolt's brother. Yes, he is also "Ramey Bolton" on "Game of Thrones". Maximus is the only member of the royal family without any special powers. He is not what he seems. More on him later.
Medusa- the Queen of the inhumans and wife of Black Bolt. Her hair can do crazy things.
Gorgon- cousin of Black Bolt. The dude has hooves that can cause seismic waves. What else can I say?
Karnak- another cousin who apparently has the power to assess any person or situations's weakness. It was hard to tell for sure. He does have some good fighting skills though.
Crystal- sister of Medusa. She can control the elements.
LockJaw- Crystal's giant (2000 lb) teleporting bulldog. Yes you read that correctly.

When the series opens, an inhuman (Triton) is being chased through a forest in Hawaii. He attempts to escape by jumping off a cliff into the ocean. He was on Earth looking for humans who had undergone terrigenesis and now had special powers. Apparently when the inhumans moved to the moon many years ago, some stayed behind. These people are their descendants but they dont know they are inhumans. Triton is initially assumed dead.

Meanwhile Maximus (who is seriously pissed because he doesnt have any special powers) forms a coup and takes over Attilan with the help of the King's guards. Crystal has LockJaw take Black Bolt and Karnak to Earth to hide. She also sends Medusa but not before Maximus cuts off her powerful hair. Dude, she's just not that into you. Give it a break. Maximus still have bigger plans and wants to take Earth away from humans. He's tired of living in cramped quarters on the moon.

Speaking of Earth, Bolt, Medusa, and Karkan are scattered in various locations. Dont blame the teleporting dog. He's doing the best he can. Everyone struggles to locate each other. Black Bolt gets picked up by the police.

Grade: 3 1/2 Monsters (out of 5). "Inhumans" wasnt horrible but it wasnt really good either. I want to like the show but unfortunately dont feel compelled to root for any of these characters. The sets on the moon were less than inspiring. I felt like I was watching in a 1980's B movie. "Inhumans" seems to be one of the weakest Marvel offers to date (along with "Iron Fist"). I might check out again later but right now I'm not feeling the love.