Defiance Season 2 Episodes 11 Thru 12 Recaps: Its The End Of The World As We Know It (Season Finale)

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And This Speck Of Sand Represents Belize...

We have sadly come to the end of season 2 with a two part finale entitled "All Things Must Pass" and "I Almost Prayed". And what a finale it was! They had promised the shtako would hit the fan and they werent kidding. Let me know if I missed any major plot lines below. There was sooo much going on.

The episode opens with Stahma and Datak having sexy times. She says he can come back home but she has several demands. 1. She wants to bathe alone (heaven forbid). 2. She wants to still be in charge of the family's business affairs. Datak doesnt agree and kicks her out. Next we see bags thrown over each of their heads. The Tarrs are being kidnapped!

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My Spidey Senses Tell Me That Strange Girl Is Nearby

Mordecai (Cai) the Irathi-Jewish lawyer from Omaha makes a reappearance. He has another dream of Irisa on the Kaziri spaceship. They whack the ghost creatures and then all the pods start releasing from the capsule. Cai and Irisa must vow to never see each other again or something terrible will happen.

Rafe's wife Pilar visits him at Camp Revere (the prison). They share a kiss. Will those two whacky kids get back together? Pilar is also reunited with Christie in a touching moment. Can Pilar be trusted though? I'm still not sure.

Yewll and her EGO induced girlfriend are back and trading snappy banter. I've said it before but Yewll's one liners are the BEST! Meh and Lev go in search of food and discover the buried Kaziri. It must have been activated by Irisa since she had both keys inside her. Kaziri then hacks into Lev and says all the life on earth will be terraformed (ie destroyed). But the good news is if Yewll crawls into one of the pods she will be saved. Yewll doesnt agree with the whole us vs them scenario and yanks out her EGO implant (so her "imaginary wife" cant be hacked anymore).

As we check back in with the kidnapped Tarrs, Stahma and Datak are tied together back-to-back in what looks like a grain silo. They fight but obviously cant get away from each other. Then they sorta make up. Those two have the best/worst marriage on television. I just love all their scenes together. They drip with so much gooey venomous attraction.

Meanwhile Nolan is STILL dragging a seriously injured Tommy through the woods. There are lots of flashbacks so yep poor Tommy is a goner. Niles is busy trying to woo Amanda by making her dinner and giving her a rose. WAKE UP AMANDA!!! And it's even worse than I had suspected. Niles kidnapped the Tarrs. He takes Amanda to them saying they killed Kenya. He hands her a gun and leaves. Amanda FINALLY learns the truth. She is close to killing them but does not. At least Datak grew a pair and offers to be killed in place of Stahma. Amanda tells Pottinger that if the Tarrs are killed, a power vacuum will occur in Defiance and there will be bloodshed in the streets. Of course that's not the real reason she cant kill them.

Datak and Stahma are released (not sure exactly how that happened). Datak celebrates by killing off all of their crew (including the Sensloth). No! Not Raiga! Well he did turn the Tarrs into Niles. And with that, the Tarrs are OFFICIALLY back together.

Nolan finally drags Tommy back to town only to find out that Tommy has died. Oh my goodness. At first I thought he might be resurrected in some way... but it appears he's really dead. Berlin is devastated and heads to the bar to drink. She hated Irisa before but now she REALLY hates her.

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Run For Your Lives, It's a Giant Purple Laser Pointer

Speaking of Irisa she sitting on a hill destroying the planet thanks to her creative use of telepathy and gravel. Bye bye New York. So long Belize. I never knew you well. And with that it looks like most of the E-Republic is destroyed as well.

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Just Your Average Happy Family (If It Included A Terrorist Who Framed His Father & Kidnapped Kenya Rosewater, A Murderer With Casti Baby Super Powers, & A Crazy Sarah Connors Mom)

Pilar has a run-in with the Tarrs. Haaa great fun! Then she tries to talk Christie and Alak into moving away from Defiance to some place where a child such as theirs will not feel like an outcast. She attempts to lure Christie with talk of horses. Alak says all the horses died during the plagues. But Pilar says Indogene technology brought them back. And here we begin to see what we had previously suspected. Pilar is not just interested in a loving family reunion. Quentin knocks Alak out and stuffs him in the back of the car. Pilar draws a gun on Christie. Off they drive.

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Are You OK With My Plan To Save The Earth By Killing Your Daughter (And Does This Hat Make My Head Look Too Silver)?

Yewll has a plan to save the world but it involves killing Irisa. Nolan doesnt go for that. He pulls a gun on everyone and holds Mercado hostage. Amanda pulls a letter opener on Cai. Craziness ensues. Nolan beats down a few red shirts (and later twarts Amanda shooting Irisa). He ends up with Cai and rescues Irisa. She exchanged mouth metal with Cai. They go into the cave where they see the ship. They need to find the arkbrain to stop it from destroying the planet and controlling Irisa. Then that irritating munchkin Irzu shows up again. Irisa is whisked off to jail (but she's really just dreaming). Tommy appears and says he deserved better than to die, she's his beautiful wife, blah, blah, blah. Luckily she resists and is back among the living.

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The Most Bad Ass Crime Family On Television

Berlin arrives at the prison to find prisoners being executed by the guards. She tries to stop them but they beat her and plan to shoot her and Rafe next. Just then the Tarrs arrive, take out the guards and free the prisoners. Datak looks at Berlin and says "family emergency" and drags Rafe away. Hilarious! Where are these people going to learn to NEVER, EVER mess with the Tarrs?

The reunited Cai and Irisa lay down inside the Kaziri and mind-blast the orbiting ships out of the sky. Earth is saved! But of course then the Kaziri explodes, there's an earthquake or something like that. Run for your lives!

And here's where everyone is at the end of season 2:

Christie and Crazy Mom and Quentin (with an unconscious Alak in the back) are speeding through the desert in the middle of the night. In hot pursuit are the Tarrs and Rafe.
Berlin has been beaten to a pulp but she's OK.
Tommy is apparently really dead. I hope he finds a nice police gig in heaven.
Nola and Irisa are in one of those little pod things WAY, WAY, WAY under ground.
Amanda has sexy times with Niles. Yuck.
Irisa and Cai have saved the planet from destruction (but where did Cai go at the end)?
Yewll is hanging out back in her office. Is she in everyone's good graces again?

Favorite Quotes:

"I should have left Defiance with Kenya Rosewater last year."- Stahma to Datak.
"I loved Kenya"- Stahma to Amanda. To which Amanda replies "It was a business. She didnt love you any more than Rupert the Miner or Datak." Ouch that hurt. I died a little inside.
"Did you just hack my imaginary wife?"- Yewll to Kaziri.
"Tell the Kaziri to take her 3000 year old instructions and shove them up her virtual ass."- Dr Yewll. Yewll, you are simply the best!
"I think of you as a carnival act.. You two are funny white faced clowns."- Pilar to Stahma and Datak.
"It's not like I dropped a whore from the top of the gateway arch."- Datak to Christie. Too soon Datak, way too soon!
Nolan (after seeing Amanda hold a letter opener against Kai's throat): "Is that a weapon?" Amanda: "Its a popular weapon in this office."
"Family emergency" says Datak as the Tarrs storm the prison and kill the guards.
Datak (in reference to Pilar): "You should have killed her all those years ago." Rafe: "Well live and learn."

Grade: 5 Monsters (out of 5). Two excellent episodes. I just wished they hadnt killed off the Sensoth. RIP big guy. The special effects were at times hokey and it was surprisingly easy to disarm the big brain of the Kaziri. But I dont care. The good far outweighed the bad.